Dependable Erection

Sunday, April 01, 2007

April Fool's traffic circle blogging



Early arrivals at the annual Duke Park April Fool's traffic circle brunch. Catching up on this year's issue of the DPN (Dyke Park Neighborhood) Alternative News and enjoying coffee and bagels are Andrew, Cindy, Carter, Richard, Rosalia, Claire (partially obscured), Macy, Jenni, and Todd.

Feature stories in this year's issue included "Excessive Whining Covered Under Noise Ordinance": (First time offenders, in lieu of jail time or heavy fines, will be offered a sentence of twenty hours of community service behind the customer service desk at Italiana Piazza.); "City Realizes Slogan Sucks": (The City of Durham has issued a statement acknowledging that its new slogan –— "Durham: Where Great Things Happen" –— sucks. The slogan, which took two years and cost $64,000 to develop, was the result of a series of focus groups involving the most boring people imaginable. "That slogan doesn't rock," said City Manager Patrick Baker. "It totally blows. Even Cary could do better than that."); and "Cary Couple Survives After Dark Visit to Durham": (The life changing event took place two weeks ago and included dinner at Grasshopper. "We thought it might be soul food," exclaimed Muffy. After dinner, they walked down Ninth Street, looking in store windows and sneaking a peek into the Regulator. "They have the same dates on their calendars that we do!" declared Biff.)

If you have to ask where to pick up your copy, then i'm afraid you're not cool enough to have one.

Sorry.

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1 Comments:

  • Crap -- I totally forgot it was DPN day. D'oh!

    By Blogger Joe, at 2:14 PM  

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